Pretty much my worst slob-related-nightmare happened this week. You know the one . . . you are out of town and someone has to get into your house because of an emergency.
Yep.
It happened.
The kids and I left Monday morning for Cousin’s Camp, three hours away. Hubby was already at a work-related-retreat and wouldn’t be home until Tuesday evening. I was relaxing after the kids’ bedtime Monday evening when it hit me . . . I didn’t turn off the coffee pot.
My sweet and well-meaning aunt assured me that I probably did turn it off. I was confident that I had not. I remembered turning it on, having my coffee, and then ushering the kiddos out the door.
No Internet access meant that I couldn’t google “How long before a left-on-coffee-pot burns down a house?” I was in a panic, and wished I hadn’t remembered. If I hadn’t remembered, any mess or destruction would have been technically unavoidable, and I could live my life guilt-free. However, knowing that it was on meant that I had to do something about it. Something that involved having someone go into my house . . . . without me there. Without even 5 minutes warning to clean up, and without being able to steer them away from the open master bedroom door, or do a tap dance to distract them if they appeared to notice a pair of dirty undies sitting on the coffee table.
But I couldn’t justify letting my house burn down just for the sake of my pride. And after all, I’ve come a very long way from what they would have seen last year at this point in the summer.
So I did it. I found the number of a neighbor who lives two doors down, who has never been in my home, and I called. I gave her our garage door code and told her where the kitchen was, and then went I on and on about how messy the house was. (Even though for me, it could have been soooo much worse.) She laughed and said “It’s summer! Everyone’s house is messy!” Thankfully she didn’t keep me on the phone so I didn’t have to hear her gasp as she opened the door.
Today, on arriving home, my stomach hurt. I was about to see what she saw. No more convincing myself that maybe it wasn’t that bad. The moment of truth had arrived.
And honestly, it wasn’t that bad. The office has quite a bit of clutter, the living room’s main problem was stacks of clean clothes waiting to be packed, and the kitchen wasn’t pristine by any means, but it wasn’t full-fledged-gross. The dining room table is embarrassingly cluttered.
Talk about a way to make yourself see your home through completely open eyes.
(And just to clarify, we’ve had multiple coffee pots that automatically shut off . . . but I keep breaking the glass pots, and we have to go back to our old faithful.)
Seeing our homes through someone else's eyes can be a real….well, a real eye opener. I find myself doing it every so often too.
I don't really care what the cable guy or the mailman thinks of my yard/house but knowing that one of my husband's co-workers was going to stop by the house got me in a weed pulling tither.
Good for you for calling your neighbor and letting your mind rest easy while you were away.
Oh my gosh
I would have been hyperventilating LOL
But I'm sure it didn't seem bad to her at all – everyone's house gets crazy as you're in the midst of packing etc too – so anything cluttered would be attributed to that ;p
Glad you salvaged the house and hold your head up high!
I can count on one hand the number of times I’ve let non-related people come into my house in the past 15 years. Then we did get it presentable for my son’s 2010 high school graduation party (again, all relatives but my husband’s neat freak side of the family were there as well). At one point during the party I had to go into my office room and cry because I just *knew* everyone was looking around for yet another reason to hate me/feel superior to me (like realizing I forgot to dust between the spindles on the wooden kitchen chairs or wash the muddy doggy door). I don’t have to worry about another graduation party till 2018 but my daughter doesn’t want to have one since I was so upset over my son’s. At any rate, last month I had a crisis and my therapist actually made a house call. He was nice enough about everything that day, but then at my next session when we talked about my house, he said, “This is a problem.” It really hurt my feelings (and next time I feel that low I’m NOT calling him). So back to being a hermit. I’m reading your blog from the beginning (I got the link from a Facebook friend notification that they “liked” your page). You’ve given me a lot of hope, and I still have 3 years of posts left to read. Thank you.
Welcome, Debbie!
Debbie,
I am not a slob by nature, but have been down before and let my house get away from me. I feel your pain. You are not alone sweetie.
Have your daughter’s graduation party at a park – one that is fairly far from your home so no one wants to “stop by” before or after.
Or maybe she could combine with a friend. You provide the food and the other parents provide the location.
For the future when you need a new coffee pot, we use the Mr. Coffee one, that has the stainless steel pot. And it doesn’t have a burner and it stays warm for hours!!